Forgiving a cheater: Can you or should you?

Infidelity might be one of the most deeply damaging situations to be put in, especially for the person on the receiving end. With today’s hook ups and ease of meeting new people over the internet, most cheaters find it easy to get away with this sin. While people may have varied opinion on the subject, I would personally never want to continue a relationship with a cheater. He might be full of remorse and may never cheat again (though the chances are bleak), its a matter of principles and some are just not worth breaking.

If you do face such a situation and are on the crossroads about whether to give your partner a second chance or not, then consider the following points to make a decision.

  1. Second chance or the Second-second chance

Second chance

Try to reflect on whether this really is your partner’s first time cheating or are you continuously running in a loop of cheating-forgiving-cheating. Remember the effect that being cheated on has on your mental and emotional health and then decide if you are ready to keep on forgiving any more.

  1. True remorse

True remorse

A person who realizes his mistake, would go to great lengths to correct the same. Remorse is true only when the mistake is accepted and genuine guilt is felt. Check if your partner is ready to accept his shortcoming or if they are deflecting his/her infidelity on you.

  1. How ready are you to forgive

are you ready  to forgive

Forgiving takes time, it can’t be done in one night and it is not one person’s responsibility. If your partner is equally involved in earning your forgiveness, it might be easier for you to build your trust again.

  1. Make sure it is the final time

no mercy

If you do choose to forgive your partner, it would be better to make it clear that this is a one time thing and no mercy would be bestowed if the same situation arose in the future.

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